Real Talk

[Real Talk][grids]

Au Naturale

[AU NATURALE][grids]

Weddings

[Weddings][bsummary]

Health & Lifestyle

[Health & Lifestyle][bsummary]

Exquisitely African

[EXQUISITELY AFRICAN][bleft]

Sponsored Post

[sponsored post][bleft]

Wake up or Make up?

I've received mails from a few people. First lemme just say thanks for the love and always looking forward to future posts. I'd keep doing my best to deliver.
I got a question last night about still being in contact with an ex and if getting back with one is a good idea


Hmmmmm.....this one hard me sha oh. There are different things to consider, but I'm just gon say what I think and let all of you reading to decide ai?

For a relationship to have ended, something (whatever it is) was the reason for the split I believe. Whether or not you were the one that walked out, that relationship already ran its course.  If you get back with him/her, there's a 90% chance that the same reason for it failing the first time would be the cause of its failure again...sometimes its something even worse. And some people end up having messier breakups than before. Why put yourself through double the emotional trauma? My dear, left to me, I'd advice you just fashi and move on. There's always someone better just around the corner. Step up your standards! I've had my own share of an on again off again r/ship...and its not worth the stress, best believe that!! You garra wake up!!!

Now I'm not against reconciliation and forgiveness oh. Forgive! You would heal even faster. Be friends sef if you can but please set boundaries. As for still being in contact, I don't see the harm in it just as long as you already know that ship has sailed.

However if your present partner is not very ok with you being all warm and fuzzy with the ex, jor oh, reduce contact. Hi-hello once in 3 months and seasonal greetings should do. Your partner has a right to get uncomfortable when it comes to an ex, after all you once had feelings for that human...anything can happen.

I know there may be exceptions to all these like if the break up was rash and hasty, if the relationship was great or the break up was circumstantial...but just be sure you're not about to make a mistake again. I don talk finish

Your turn now... Talk with Krystal :)

15 comments:

  1. Enee Fenty3/2/16 14:14

    WELLLLLLL, honest to God opinion and not out of spite for any human, why would any sane person go back to their ex? Why? Has the reason why you gave up on something & someone you loved for probably a long time & very dearly become so insignificant that you can up and decide you can/want to fix it? Why didn't you fix it then instead of letting go? Yes we can all change and modify our behaviors as humans, but as long as it involves another human being, no matter how modified "a" becomes, there'll always be that flicker of doubt at the back of "b"s mind thinking 'What if it rears its ugly head again?' Don't be fooled by the 'Forgive and Forget' concept. We often forgive, but we never forget.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am of the view that no relationship is ever a waste of time cos if it didn't bring you what you want, it taught you what you don't want,. So why go back to what you don't want? I mean if you both finally realize what the problem is/was and have figured out a way to work it out, then Great! But if not, I don't see a reason to deceive yourself after all "you can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one"...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wise word!!! Wise wisee

      Delete
  3. Dozie A.3/2/16 19:42

    If the break-up came due to an action of one of the partners, and the offending partner truly feels remorse for his/her action, why can't you get back to him/her??? Dozie A.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But the fact that he or she feels remorse doesn't change the reason for the break up right? For it to have led to that I don't see why you should want to repeat the same mistake

      Delete
  4. Anonymous3/2/16 20:11

    for me, i have my exes on speed dial jst incase i fall out with my main chic and need some action.
    But i say dear brothers and sisters WAKE UP, if he/she hurts you once he/she wud definitely hurt u again.

    Larry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous4/2/16 09:08

      @Larry,I hope you don't have a case of "Hotline Bling"... seriously,having your exes on speed dial goes to show you never believed in your "main chick" and it's a shame.

      Delete
  5. @larry... Chaiiii Diaris God o ;(

    ReplyDelete
  6. A relationship that failed once will probably not fail again since both party know their flaws already, they either ignore or work on reason that led to d initial break up. As for communicating with an ex, Hmmmh. you better not wait for your date to get uncomfortable or complain about it b4 you stop. *sipping my zobo*

    ReplyDelete
  7. A relationship that failed once will probably not fail again since both party know their flaws already, they either ignore or work on reason that led to d initial break up. As for communicating with an ex, Hmmmh. you better not wait for your date to get uncomfortable or complain about it b4 you stop. *sipping my zobo*

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous4/2/16 08:34

    I strongly believe the past should remain in the past!��

    ReplyDelete
  9. "Heed not as the past beckons, it has no new tales to tell"... I believe in peace, and maintaining cordiality if there's need for communication,no need for hostility and enmity.

    ReplyDelete
  10. What if is because of long distance and u guys just decided to break up cos of lack of comunication, is it wrong to get back together later in life

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The reason I said there may be exceptions to the situation luv. But if he/she wanted it to work they should have stayed in contact tho.

      Delete
  11. "Heed not as the past beckons, it has no new tales to tell"... I believe in peace, and maintaining cordiality if there's need for communication,no need for hostility and enmity.

    ReplyDelete