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ARRANGED MARRIAGES


Please how absurd is it that in this present time and age, people still get into arranged marriages? Even if this is African Magic movie...I fail to see the logic behind it. Gone are the days when our parents would just wake up one morning and decide that their children's future concerning marriage life. There's nothing like "you'd learn to love him or her later" or "he/she would take good care of you" or "marry them or I will drink poison"....that kinda stuff is not suppose to move anyone to do what they don't want. In the end who's gon be stuck in an unhappy marriage? YOU! Who would die of depression and misery? Still YOU. Who may decide to cheat on the spouse to carry on some love affair they had prior to the arranged marriage? This is not just a blind date someone is setting you up with. It would pretty much determine how your future would turn out. In my opinon you should be the one bringing home someone to introduce to them, not the other way around. With the rate of failed arranged marriages you would think parents would give it a rest. Yes a few may work but what about the 98% that are ridiculously miserable and would rather take their lives than continue to remain in such bondage? Sigh!

Anyways, based on a typical scenario, let's picture this. You're in a relationship, might be pretty serious yea? And suddenly your "parents" inform you that you're set to meet with a prospective spouse. That in fact in their heads y'all married already and you should be expecting thy in-laws soon... Ejor, would you just like that agree like you don't have your own will? Would you dismiss your partner and tell him or her about the whole situation?

As always I'd give you guys a piece of my mind and let you do the talking as well. If my folks decide to pull this type of stunt for whatever reasons they have, even though in their own twisted way they may have my best interest in mind....no wahala. Let that person come. So that I'd find out which century the person is still living in that he would have to go through some ancient means to get a life partner. I mean it makes no sense to have to settle down with someone you know little or nothing about just because you know the family or you've heard some stuffs that caught your fancy. Who does that? You're not even sure if y'all would be able to co-habit in peace. O di mma. I shall meet with that person. Pay attention and even smile; ask for my number oh to keep talking and plan the marriage...what's there? I would give you naw. After much-a-do, by the time I have wasted your time asking you WAEC and JAMB questions. when the thing don full my head, politely oh, I'd tell you to try your luck somewhere else.

Then I would jejely tell my dear parents "Oh dad, oh mum, we're not right for each other, That's not the one God has chosen for me"....and you know Nigerian parents are religious. Involve God in the situation ni..."I'm waiting for the one God would send at his own time". If your folks are traditionalists or pagans, try something else like amadioha or sango or the universe is not in synch with the arrangement. And don't even try to start telling your partner sef unless the entire situation gets out of hands (don't wait till it erupts like a volcano though). Telling him or her about it is like mounting some type of pressure on them, giving them "quick notice" to start doing the needful asap or start packing to leave your life. Again, I still think it's annoying for folks to run their children's lives even to who they get married to. As adults we should be allowed to make our choices yea? Whether or not we make mistakes, in the end we learn from them, they shape us up to be better at the choices we make. Parents can advice us yea? That's where it ends...as far as that your child has reached legal age for making informed decisions, let him or her make use of their right to choose.

My advice is...don't go marrying a stranger just because your family asked you to. Be selfish and put your happiness first. It's ok if you take your time to know the person though, who knows he/she might just be the one. But don't be in a hurry and agree to a planned date. It's your life and your future happiness at stake!!

Na there the matter end for me. Let's talk shall we? Talk with Krystal :)
P.S: It's Easter tomorrow oh. I accept easter gifts too. Incase you want to take me out sef you know how to reach me *picks race*

2 comments:

  1. I am in a culturally diverse society presently and amongst my list of culture shock is the fact that arranged marriages STILL exist and is accepted in the MIDDLE EAST. My housemate is Afghanistan an he was telling he about how his mum is looking for a wife for him. My friends from Iran, Pakistan, Turkey ( they are Muslims ) and then the ones from India, Nepal, see it as normal even though now they are in a more civilized setting, they know it's not cool and they try to break the jinx. I spent the early hours of this morning consoling my Pakistan friend that was crying cuz they have married him off in his absence and he is in love with someone here! His mother is threatening sucide if he remarries! I am so f*****g pissed. Most of us are lucky so we shouldn't mess up our chance at love marriage! #Lordhavemercy

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    1. Oh my gosh!!! This is so horrible and annoying...we can only hope it comes to an end. Wish parents would begin to understand..Lord have mercy indeed!! Thanks for sharing dear

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